This month feels almost like a relaunch for With Mads. Maybe it’s because it feels like the start of a new season, because I’m back at work postpartum, because it’s my birthday, or because we’re committed to posting more to help build this community–or maybe it’s all of these things. But regardless I FEEL ENERGIZED. I have new sense of purpose to do what I love. I’ve always loved writing, I talked about it in the first post of this blog, but lately it feels more like something I have to do because I love it; not just a distant idea that would be great to do eventually. The time is neigh.
Little baby Mads
When I was ten years old I found poetry first. After 9/11 I needed a way to process my emotions, primarily the fear I felt, and that manifested itself in a poem. I used this tool to talk about things I wanted at that age, things that I was feeling, but also it was a way to put words together in beautiful little vignettes. From there, fiction writing took hold and I wrote stories about horses and Jane Austen; specifically one story about a horse and one about Jane Austen. English classes in high school weren’t my favorite. I was told once I was too verbose (hilarious if you know me personally I don’t think anyone who knows me personally would ever describe me as verbose). I also felt too advanced for hamburger style paragraphs which turned into hamburger style essays (if you know you know), I always wanted to be more challenged.
When writing became inspiring
When I started my undergrad (I like saying undergrand like one day I’ll get a masters or PhD and my bachelor’s degree is just the start of my secondary education, we fancy.) I thought I wanted to be a doctor and follow in my father’s footsteps. But then mgiraines got the best of me and in the middle of aphysicis exam I had a epiphany, I wanted to be an English major. So I wrote a little poem on the test, freeing myself of the expectations I wouldn’t be able to meet of a career that wasn’t’ for me, and decided that I was gonig to be a writer.
I loved my English classes. Every class was challenging and thought-provoking. I pushed the limits of my brain into realms I didn’t’ know existed. I left classes feeling inspired, and turned in essays feeling particularly bad ass. It was always a dream to have a blog. Tumblr became popular and I’m pretty sure there’s some meager half-start of it existing in the archived logs of the interwebs, but I never committed. It wasn’t until I was laid off from my job in tech when I realized it was now or never. And then I got pregnant.
I loved my English classes. Every class was challenging and thought-provoking. I pushed the limits of my brain into realms I didn’t’ know existed.
My challenges with writing
My pregnancy was challenging, and while I was able to launch my blog, I wasn’t able to write. I even lost the ability to use my hands with crippling carpal tunnel. I could hardly get off the couch during those months, my head would be spinning in pain, or my hands clutching my mouth trying not to vomit. Not cute, not demure.
What inspired me to be consistent
But then I had my beautiful baby boy and felt inspired again to pick up my blog. This precious and aesthetically pleasing thing that was all mine. It wasn’t bound to a platform or anyone or anything else, it was just for me. As I’m growing this community and expanding into the With Mads Newsletter, posting more on my Instagram and Pinterest, and trying to put myself out there in the fashion community, I’m finding myself really excited. Writing is coming to easily to me and I care so much less about things being perfect. I don’t want a community that is judgmental, I want one that is excited to talk about fashion and wants to learn from each other. I want to help curate a place that is safe and open, and because that’s what I aim to manifest I’m holding myself to the standard of “good enough” not “perfect.”
Doing what YOU love
What do you love? Is it something you have figured out how to incorporate into your life? Are you making money from it? Is it your primary objective everyday–to do that thing? My husband is a musician and has found a way to turn music into his career. He loves it. He’s obsessed. And that’s one of the things I love about him, it has inspired so much in this process of getting my own shit together. I would love to know what you love or even just what you’re interested in. Drop a comment below; I’d love to learn more about you!
